[rumori] Fw: Is Watford in Ireland?


Paul (paulATrandom99.freeserve.co.uk)
Fri, 26 Nov 1999 15:36:13 -0000


> > From: Luther Blissett Project Newz <lutherATsyntac.net>
> > To: Recipient list suppressed <Recipient list suppressed>
> > Date: 25 November 1999 04:02
> > Subject: Is Watford in Ireland?
> >
> > A prestigious yank's whimsical mythopoesis on the Luther Blissett
Project:
> > is Watford in Ireland? Is Ireland even in Yoorope? Enter none other than
> > the American conspiracy novelist Robert Anton Wilson!
> >
> > http://www.realastrology.com/oracle/robert-oct.html
> >
> > Reality Loop-the-Loops
> >
> > I AM HE AS SHE IS ME AS WE ARE ALL TOGETHER
> > By Robert Anton Wilson
> >
> > "In the dialectic between nature and the socially
> > constructed world, the human organism is
> > transformed. In this dialectic man produces
> > reality and thereby produces himself."
> > --Berger and Luckman, The Social Creation of Reality
> >
> > Would you believe that an English football star has stolen the infant
> > Jesus--four times, from four different Italian churches--and is holding
him
> > or them for a ransom of 100, 000, 000 lire?
> >
> > Well, neither would I, but it seems to have happened, sort of. But then
> > most things in this confusing modern world only seem to have happened .
.
> > . sort of. . . .
> >
> > Luther Blissett, to start at the top, was once the best footballer in
> > England, as well known and beloved as O.J. Simpson was over here, before
he
> > got accused of cutting throats. Now Mr. Blissett is a coach in Watford,
> > Ireland. Unlike O.J. he has never been charged with a major felony, or
even
> > with jay-walking. He says he knows nothing about the other Luther
Blissett
> > who, in addition to holding Jesus for ransom, has written a number of
> > anarchist tracts, including a left-wing history of the Rennaisance, and
is
> > suspected, by the Italian authorities, of being a group rather than a
> > person.
> >
> > Some, of course, claim he is the Devil.
> >
> > It seems to have begun--the miraculous multiplication of Blisetts--when
the
> > true, original Luther Blissett became a hero, and a controversial
figure,
> > in Milan while playing football there 10 years ago. Most sports fans
loved
> > him for his derring-do, but Italian neo-fascists hated him for the
double
> > offenses of [a] being black and [b] winning higher scores than white
> > players.
> >
> > Luther Blissett the First (as we better call him for clarity) went back
to
> > England, remembering his triumphs and trying, I suppose, to forget the
> > racism.
> >
> > Luther Blissett the Second, Third, Fourth, and Fifth manifested a few
years
> > later when four workers were arrested for riding on a train without a
> > ticket. Each insisted his name was "Luther Blissett," and stuck to that
> > name, even when hauled into court for sentencing.
> >
> > Then other Luther Blissetts began to appear, on Internet and even in
> > bookstores. As to whether he or they were or are a group or an
individual,
> > they or he (or she) offered the following explication:
> >
> > "Luther Blissett is not a 'teamwork identity' as reported by the
> > journalists; rather, it is a multiple single. The 'Luther Blissetts'
don't
> > exist, only Luther Blissett exists. Today we can infuse ourselves with
> > vitality by exploring any possibility of escaping conventional
identities.
> > The struggle is still against the language of the powers-that-be."
> >
> > If that isn't perfectly clear to non-anarchists, recall the Dada
movement
> > in Switzerland during World War I. The Dadaists, in total rebellion
against
> > the insanity of war and the general insanity of everything else, held
> > poetry readings at which the poet was drowned out by other Dadaists with
> > noise-makers. They had art exhibits where the audience was provided with
> > axes at the door and told to destroy any paintings they didn't like.
They
> > held lectures in public urinals. In short, they began the "post-modern"
> > revolution against conventional "identities" and the language that
divides
> > things and people into classes.
> >
> > In 1923, in Paris, the Surrealists held their first art show. To enter
the
> > gallery, the audience had to pass through a garden with an incongruous
taxi
> > standing in the way. Working their way around the cab, they had the
> > opportunity to observe that it was raining inside of it but not outside.
(A
> > whimsy of Salvidor Dali.) Once in the gallery, the audience-- or the
> > victims, as you prefer--confronted a sign devised by Andr� Breton:
> >
> > DADA IS NOT DEAD!
> > WATCH YOUR OVERCOAT!
> >
> > Or, to move closer to the present enigma, consider the time novelist Ken
> > Kesey met novelist Terry Southern. Kesey found to his delight that
Southern
> > was just as funny in person as he was in his books and they had a
wonderful
> > time together. Only long after did Kesey discover that he had not met
Terry
> > Southern at all. He had met somebody else--an "imposter" in
pre-anarchist
> > language.
> >
> > I also met Terry Southern once, or think I did, and also found him
> > hilarious. Of course, with Kesey's experience in mind, I might wonder if
I
> > actually met the "real" Terry Southern. But modern anarchists would
inform
> > me that even asking such a question is buying into the language and
> > metaphysics of the ruling class which oppresses us by defining us. One
can
> > only say that Terry Southern has become a multiple single.
> >
> > Anyway, once Luther Blissett was firmly established as both an
individual
> > sports hero in Ireland and one or many anarcho-surrealists in Italy,
life
> > became more interesting for Europeans--the way it was for most of us on
> > this side of the pond in the 1980s when we could watch Ronald Reagan
play
> > the hero's buddy in a morning college football movie on TV, then catch
him
> > again playing the hero himself in a Western in the afternoon, and
finally
> > see him a third time playing the President on the evening news.
> >
> > The Italian Luther Blissett(s) then published a book of essays allegedly
by
> > Arab-American anarchist, Hakim Bey. It later turned out that only one
essay
> > was by Bey; the rest were forgeries--although one was a translation from
> > John Zerzan, the Oregon anarchist who became famous, or infamous, for
> > declaring that the Unabomber was his personal hero.
> >
> > Things became a bit stranger when the infant Jesus disappeared from a
> > church in Belvedere, followed quickly by the vanishings of three more
> > infant Jesi from churches in Marittimo, Tortora, and Diamante, all four
> > cities being on the Tyrrhenian coast.
> >
> > "What is the Buddha?" a student once asked a Zen Master.
> > "The one in the hall," replied the Master.
> > "But the one in the hall is a statue, a piece of wood! "
> > "True. . . ."
> > "Then what is the Buddha?"
> > "The one in the hall."
> >
> > Italians seem to understand Zen logic better than most Europeans and the
> > dematerializing Jesi (or Jesuses?) really caused mass emotional
reactions.
> > It was as if Andy Warhol had sued Campbell Soup for selling cheap
imitation
> > Warhols.
> >
> > Then the ecclesiastical athorities received a communique (written on an
old
> > Olivetti typewriter) demanding that the Church distribute one hundred
> > million lire to the poor, or else:
> > "The Holy Child will be destroyed. Anyway, you only care for the money,
> > not for the Child's sacral value. . . . In Calabria people die of
hunger,
> > thirst, unemployment, mafia, corruption and usury. Illegal employment
is
> > the rule. There are no houses. The Church doesn't care and gets richer.
If
> > you don't distribute a 100 million lire worth of food . . . the Holy
Child
> > will be smashed into pieces." --Luther Blissett
> >
> > The prototype Luther Blissett in Ireland told the press he didn't
> > understand what was going on."They keep doing all sorts of things and I
> > keep getting the credit or the blame for it."
> >
> > The police in Italy announced that they suspected a sort of Luther
> > Blissett-X--not the "original" multiple singularity of anarchist
> > pranksters, but a band of professional art thieves masquerading as the
> > masqueraders. The infants stolen have a high commercial value, said the
> > suspicious cops, and instead of being smashed they may be sold to the
> > highest bidders, like the famous Maltese Falcon.
> >
> > One incautious priest in Belvedere remarked worriedly that the only way
to
> > prevent future thefts would be to lock all the churches and keep
everybody
> > out. The press gleefully quoted him. If there were no thieves thinking
of
> > that before, there certainly are now. . . .
> >
> > Will the Church distribute the100 million lire to the poor? Will the
Infant
> > Jesuses (Jesi?) be smashed or sold to private collecters? How many more
> > Luther Blissetts will come forth from the shadows before this saga is
over?
> > You can follow future developments through the following websites:
> >
> > http://www.blather.net/winstuff.html
> > http://www.syntac.net/lutherblissett
> > http://www.LutherBlissett.net
> > http://www.geocities.com/Paris/Leftbank/6815
> >
> > http://news.bbc.co.uk/hi/english/sport/football/newsid_293000/293678.stm
> >
> > I sort of think I know how the first Luther Blissett feels, because a
lot
> > of people on Internet still claim I was murdered by the C.I.A. on 22
Feb.,
> > 1994. No denials by me have stopped this absurd rumor, because the
> > conspiracy buffs who believe it also believe that the C.I.A.replaced me
> > with an "android" or humanoid robot which writes and talks just like
> > "Robert Anton Wilson." Some even claim that my evident "sincerity" in
> > claiming I am "Robert Anton Wilson" just proves how advanced the secret
> > technology of the C.I.A is: Any really good RAW android would not only
> > write, talk and look like me, but woud necessarily think it was me....
> >
> > As Oscar Wilde said, "The reality of metaphysics is the reality of
masks."
> >
> > --------------------------------------------------
> > For more intelligent convolutions from the world's smartest CIA-made
> > android, go to:
> > http://www.rawilson.com and prosper
> >
> > --------------------------------------------------

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